What am I doing?

This morning I awoke in a panic. It was 8:30 am. I thought, "oh. crap." Usually I'm awake at 5:30, on the road by 6 to make it to school by 7. There's NO WAY I'm going to make it into school today and not be in trouble. I've already missed like 4 periods.

Then I realize it's Dec. 6th and field placement is over. Once I have stopped myself from having a heart attack, I revert back to my before-class routine. I eat breakfast, pack my backpack. I check my facebook first, then my marauder (to find out I STILL don't have a student teaching placement) before walking out the door at 9:05 to make it to my 9:30 class in Stayer.

And as I sit in class, I think, well this is pointless. I know that my peers are going over their projects from field and I should care. And I do to a point. But then I'm thinking well if it's 9:30 I should be in third period. Those are "my" Cs. They're writing business letters today. I wonder what companies they've picked and which products they are writing about. I'm curious as to how the second period PLC went and if they've finally agreed on grammar content across grades. I doubt it. Brindle and Smith are pretty gung-ho about this grammar stuff. The others are not so much into it.

Back to my own class with my own peers, I can't turn my teacher brain off. In a short period of time, I've made a transition I didn't think I could make. When I went to Linden Hall, my student brain was on. I wanted to take notes about class and answer questions. After my time at Kennard-Dale, I have no desire to research and write a paper on the sociological effects of the Northridge Earthquake of 1994. I just want to teach. I want to be in a classroom; I want all eyes on me and I want students to be in my, what I believe to be, capable hands.